Thursday, October 25, 2012

Writing Challenge - Five Sentence Fiction - Potions



This week's writing challenge from Five Sentence Fiction ( Lillie McFerrin Writes ) is based upon the prompt "potions." . And again, I go down the path of horror (with a bit of humor) for my submission.



A Dinner He Loved




Mileva felt so terribly guilty as the young woman had recently visited begging help for her troubled marriage. The desperate newlywed was not a great beauty, nor particularly graceful or clever, nor, for that matter, skilled in any of the usual domestic arts. All the dear girl wanted was something to make her cooking irresistible to her husband giving their tenuous relationship a chance. And that, of course, was the purpose of the elixir, painstakingly prepared by Mileva, a few drops of which were to be incorporated within his evening meal. She had no idea the poor child would be so unfortunately clumsy as to spill half the bottle on herself.



The image used above the story text on this page is courtesy of openwalls.com


© 2012 K. R. Smith

17 comments:

  1. Well... I wonder what the result is going to be! Lovely post, makes me want to meet Mileva too :-)

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    1. The result? I can't say for sure, but I would imagine her husband gives her a good chewing out.

      Judging from your posts, I think Mileva, my old gypsy friend, would also enjoy meeting you.

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  2. I hate to laugh at the macabre, but this came very close to making me do so.

    Wonderfully understated, and the twist at the end is - dare I say - delicious!

    Cheers!
    JzB

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    1. Thanks! The first draft was rather dark, but the more I worked on it, the more the humorous side came out. Must be something in my psyche. I really do appreciate the comment!

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  3. You can control all sorts of things but other people! That made me laugh.

    Cheers,

    W.

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    1. The young lady must have been born under an unlucky star. Thanks for reading and the comment!

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  4. Well, perhaps she'll get half the results she's expecting, better than nothing, eh? Poor thing.

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    1. I have to say, things don't seem to be going her way. She's giving her all for her marriage...

      Thanks so much for reading! It's great to have people read and get so many comments.

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  5. She should have been careful with the potion :-P

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    1. Most definitely! Thanks for reading and the comment!

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  6. This I can relate to :) Clumsy is difficult to overcome...I'll be staying away from potions now! Nice story!!!

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    1. Thanks! This is a good format for exercising your writing skills. It make you think, but it doesn't require a huge amount of time.

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    2. Actually, it "makes" you think... And I think I need an editor for my comments.

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  7. The results will be either really good or really bad. In any event she'll get more than she bargained for. Be careful what you wish for!

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    1. Since I write horror, it'll have to be really bad! Especially on Halloween!

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  8. Perhaps the half spilled on herself will make her deliciously irresistible? Great writing!

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    1. Thanks! It always helps to keep a relationship fresh... or, at least, the "relation"!

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